I am not a lawyer or anyone that can give you options to your dilemma. I'm only a daughter of deceased parents with one sibling, an older brother who is insistant on being the executor of his will on me. I swear I could have written your letters. Our situations are profoundly similar. What I found of GREAT value on this website is surely the information that qualified people are so openly willing to share with those of us, at a time when we are emotionally scrambled, to say the least. But an added value I found that I received was in reading other people's questions that they submitted. I gathered information and I also realized that my dilemma with family situations arising from a family member's passing wasn't unusual. That actually gave me great personal confidence. So please, don't be sad with this difficult situation. You're not alone, we're all here with you. Peace.