Is this a good deal for me or am I not thinking clearly?

Been married 5 years, I earned $245,000 vs. her $88,000 over that time. She asked for divorce, we have no kids. The only asset is the house which I will keep. Paid $166,000 loan stands at $111,000. Of course in this market it is valued at around $138,000. She is asking $45,000 payout in the divorce.  Is this a good deal or should I get a lawyer to go against this.  She was in graduate school the entire time we were married.

$45000 for 5 years comes to about $173 per week.

You couldn't get a hooker or a housekeeper that cheap.

I'd give her the $45,000.

The alternative is a hostile divorce that could take a year or two and cost you $20,000 in lawyer fees on the chance that you might cut that in half.

Couple of things to do BEFORE you actually file for divorce while your credit rating is still good.

Each of you apply for individual credit cards. Pay off or transfer the joint balances to the individual cards in whatever split you decide.

If you have joint car loans, pay them off or refinance into individual names before and sign over the titles to each other.

Refinance the house into your name and get her to sign the deed over as part of the loan closing. If you make about 50K per year you shouldn't have any trouble qualifying for 111,000 on your own.

If you owe or own anything jointly after the divorce, well, you just need to read back over the divorce boards to see what kind of nightmares can result.

I fail to see why its useful or necessary to educate the other side as to additional things they might get----

If you think $45,000 is a good deal for a divorce (and considering the costs of warfare it may not be such a bad deal) then the deal as I understand it  is you get house via a deed --ideally a special warranty deed  but perhaps a quit claim deed if you are POSITIVE she has run up no encumberances on the property,  you had her good funds $45,000 and a simplified divorce order is filed/requested/entered.

Lots of divorces take place and other side is NOT taken off the mortgage and so far there is ZERO advantage for you to volunteer to take her off note--so why even open up that can of worms --it can only hurt you.

You don't mention who put what  into home but my guess is it was mostly your money --and your net paper equity after a sale and commissions is probably in just 10 K range and to split that is 5K  so she is asking for a heck of a lot more than a simple split!  It still may be a cost effective split. Especially if you sidestep splitting some valuable pension benefits. Now if you paid for her degree--thats property --but its a hard arguement to make--generally not worththe debate unless its an MD or something with high earnings potential.

So offer her $30,000 and see if she accepts --but get it reduced to writing and in order form before for she changes her mind and wants to add conditions--many places in a divorce you can recant private deals and reopen a can of worms unless it gets reduced to order .

This is a great deal take it.

I am not agreeing or disagreeing that $45,000 is a great deal--but I very VERY strongly suggest you use your counsel to draft the agreement and that counsel proceed with promptness to get it entered as an order!  Spending the few extra bucks to have it done right is the best insurance you can get.

Personally I would have everything well crafted except for entry of the final number, if my adversary threw out $45,000 as an initial number I might think when presented with an offer of sign here and you get  $ XXX  that the person might grab say $ 30,000 and run.  BUT I would carefully control presentation of my offer and it stays on the table only while its on table and papework does not go walkabout . In effect I'd want to make it easy for other side to grab money and run--focus on easy  --and money --

I'm assuming you are in position to  cut a check for good funds and she can run--if not--get there  or at least make it as close to grab it and run as you can posture it for her to grab. Use counsel for wording!

Me, I'd not use my  lawyers office for presentation of offer/signature as I think it threatens enemy and invites them to be on extra special guard-EG why is your lawyer here- you want to done--not second guessed 3 times over--but you know enemy and you sort out the dynamics of how to present and close. Then again if your lawyer is skilled at presentation matters his or her office may be a perfect place--but discuss it in any event!

Most people consider bird in hand to be worth two in bush when it comes to money--so a $30,000 bird in hand may be a darn good bird in her eyes?

Well, just my opinion here, as I don't know if it's a good deal for you or not.

However, I would agree with Drew, but I would actually consider offering $20k with an expectation of agreeing to maybe around $25k.

My ex requested a similiar deal.  She wanted $100k, I counter offered at $30k, and we ended up agreeing to $50k. 

She was extremely focused on 'money this very second'

You can use that to your advantage!

If you can find am amicable resolution to the end of your marriage that doesn't result in hatred, a long drawn out divorce and thousands and thousands of attorneys fees, then do it.  There is no price for peace of mind and smoothly moving on with your life.