How to find out if a child was adopted

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Latest post 02-29-2008 10:44 AM by JoBraver. 14 replies.
  • 02-28-2008 1:03 AM

    • Xena2
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    Question [=?] How to find out if a child was adopted

    Approximately two years ago, I was asked to sign and have notarized a document to terminate parental rights so that a step parent could adopt my biological child. This was done and returned and I never received any further correspondence on the topic. I've paid child support since the child was born (now 12) in one state and I continue to do so through that state even though the child lives in a different state. I have never met the child, but have some contact with the child via phone calls and letters. I received some information from the other parent with school information that had the child listed with a different last name than appears on the birth certificate.

    How can I find out if the child was adopted? I do not know which state or what county it would have been filed in. If it did occur and the records are sealed, how could I get access to this information?

    How can I find out how the child's name was changed? Could the name have been changed my consent and without an adoption?
  • 02-28-2008 12:29 PM In reply to

    re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    How about asking the other parent to provide proof of the adoption?
  • 02-28-2008 2:13 PM In reply to

    re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    If you signed your rights away you gave up any right to know anything about the child. Also, since you gave up your rights you should not have been having to pay child support. Once you sign away your rights, they can go through with the adoption and change the name without having your consent.
  • 02-28-2008 3:49 PM In reply to

    • CJ
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    re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    So you gave up your rights yet you still have contact with your child? Does mom know you're speaking to eachother? Why is mom sending you items from school if she has had her new husband adopt the child? This all sounds a little strainge. "Typically" once a parent asks for the termination of rights by the otehr parent, that parent drops out of the childs life forever or at least until 18.
    The fact that you are still paying support is also very strainge unless what you're paying is arrears in support.

  • 02-28-2008 9:19 PM In reply to

    • Xena2
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    re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    I have asked when I was going to get the child on my insurance plan (the mother's request) and she did not return the call or provide any information. I can not have her on the insurance plan if her name is different than the birth certificate.
  • 02-28-2008 9:21 PM In reply to

    • Xena2
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    re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    "Also, since you gave up your rights you should not have been having to pay child support."

    That is correct and I should not have to provide insurance for the child which is why I am trying to find out how to pursue this.
  • 02-28-2008 9:28 PM In reply to

    • Xena2
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    re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    Yes, that is correct. Mom knows we are speaking to each other. I agree it is very strange behavior for her to provide the information. She provided that because she said (two years later) that she wants us to be a part of each other's lives and she also said that she wanted to send me a document to agree to a higher amount of child support, insurance and medical bills --- without going through the state that she currently resides in because she knew that they would "take more than I could afford", which she stated that she did not want to do that to me. I also find very strange that she would be so concerned about my financial welfare so much that she would not want to request through the state for child support.

    Her behavior is very fishy to me, which is why I would like to know how to pursue this. It appears that she is trying to have the cake and eat it too (i.e. she has the child adopted, but would still like to continue to receive money -- more than she is receiving in the other state), but I am unsure of how to find out.
  • 02-28-2008 9:56 PM In reply to

    Feedback [*=*] re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    Get a lawyer. If the child was adopted, your legal obligation to provide financial support ceased at that moment.
  • 02-29-2008 2:30 AM In reply to

    • Xena2
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    Question [=?] re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    Does it matter which state? I live in one state, the child support is taken in another and the child and her mother live in a different state.
  • 02-29-2008 2:37 AM In reply to

    • Xena2
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    re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    I neglected to respond to the statement of "unless what you're paying is arrears in support." I am not paying in arrears. All support is current and ongoing.
  • 02-29-2008 2:41 AM In reply to

    Feedback [*=*] re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    NO, it doesn't matter. If the child was adopted, no matter what state anybody's in, your legal obligation to pay ongoing child support stops as a matter of law the date the adoption is final. On that date, you are no longer that child's legal parent. GET A LAWYER.
  • 02-29-2008 2:51 AM In reply to

    • Xena2
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    Agree [=|=] re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    Thank you, Gemini. I know that I need to get a lawyer, I just wasn't sure which state or how to best find out about the child's status as the mother is unwilling to share this information. I appreciate your responses as well as all the other responses and feedback. It is much appreciated.
  • 02-29-2008 10:44 AM In reply to

    re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    For another point of view; you need an attorney from the state where the child support order is through which will have to confirm the adoption of the child through the state the child was ( possibly ) adopted in;

    Just because you signed papers doesn't mean they were ever acted upon which would have involved filing with the court, an order terminating your parental rights and an order granting the adoption.
  • 02-29-2008 12:28 PM In reply to

    re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    If she has been adopted she is no longer your child. You have no obligation to pay support or provide insurance.
  • 02-29-2008 12:30 PM In reply to

    re: How to find out if a child was adopted

    I'd start by sending a certified letter asking for copies of the adoption proceeding. I'd also check with a local lawyer about stopping all financial support until she provides evidence one way or the other.
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