How long can a divorce take?

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Latest post Mon, Oct 31 2016 8:19 AM by Drew. 13 replies.
  • Mon, Aug 29 2011 11:47 PM

    • kg4u2
      Consumer
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    • Joined on Thu, Aug 12 2010
    • WI
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    How long can a divorce take?

    Mine has been going on for over a year and we don't have the final hearing on the court calendar until January of next year.  STBX and I have not yet come to agreement on anything.

    Is there not a WI state statue that indicates the divorce proceedings cannot go on forever?  I certainly have the staying power, however he is trashing and not paying on the marial home and has his girlfriends spend the nights when he has my teenage children.  Or he leaves my children at home alone and spends the night at his girlfriends.  He is a real piece of work.

    He should be held accountable for destroying the family, the family finances and continuing to flaunt his affairs. 

    Here's my proposal, your thoughts:

    1.  I forgive him from the waste of martial assets ($25K)

    2.  I forgive him from the waste of the childrens college fund ($50K)

    3.  We both agree no maintence

    4.  Joint custody

    5.  I get 100% placement of the children - which means he will need to pay, and he won't agree

    6.  I will settle for $40K from the martial  home (appraised at $225, mortgage is $70), he needs to refinance in 30-days and remove my name

    7.  I will be responsible for the childrens college

    8.  I want this settled in the next 30-days or I will bring additional legal action

    9.  He is responsible for all personal debt accumulated post seperation

    10.  I filed and paid my taxed for 2010, he is responsible for filing and reporting his own taxes and all penalties for 2010

    Additonal legal actions can and will include felony complaints and certainly civil actions based on the financial abuse

    Just looking for your thoughts on whether I should tell my lawyer this is what I want to force this to a closure.

    Thanks.

     

     

  • Tue, Aug 30 2011 12:02 AM In reply to

    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    No one here can tell you whether that's a proposal that is in your best interest or if it will do what you want in resolving the divorce in 30 days. In order to advise you on that, I'd need to know the full financials of both spouses and the history of the case to date. Talk this over over with your lawyer, he/she is the one who has the knowledge to tell you what will be best to do. Of course you can get it done faster if you are willing to conced to what the other side wants, but that may be giving up a lot that you might be entitled to get.

    I suggest you let your lawyer handle the discussion with your spouse's lawyer. If you go to your spouse and start threatening things like criminal prosecution if you don't get your way that could backfire on you and make things worse, not better.

  • Tue, Aug 30 2011 6:22 AM In reply to

    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    Yes- divorces can go on forever-  a year would be considered quick . ( My longest is 6 years)

  • Tue, Aug 30 2011 7:56 AM In reply to

    • Drew
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    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    Laymans take:  You are asking for a number of things that are not relevant  or  give him an edge to stall and your  haste to get a resolution will hurt the final outcome.  You are better off to use your attorney to wage war.

    I see many of your points---he may be a piece of work but;  speed is not likely in divorce ----

    1. If you filed your taxes properly--its not relevant what he does with his.

    2. He can easily sabotage refinancing the home if he has not done so already.

    3. If WI recognizes wasting or marital assets, you may be giving away far too much.

    4. Why give away that much share of  marital home?

    5. A parental duty to pay for college may vary a lot by state--what does WI say on point

    Personally I think you are signaling a willingness to give up far too much in return for  speedy outcome ---and his ability to refinance may already be in the toilet.

     



  • Tue, Aug 30 2011 8:03 AM In reply to

    • Drew
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    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    Absent an agreement by parties as to college, WI cuts off CS about 18 and does not include college. Parents have no duty to pay for college .

    As a practical matter the kid's best shot at need based financial aid comes by listing the  weaker financial parent as the CP.

    If you think you career might require relocation--factor same into the order now--use your lawyer.

    There are a number of outstanding public sector universities---in state status can be a big advantage.

    Share at least 1 child for taxes so each parent can get head of household status for tax purposes ?



  • Tue, Aug 30 2011 8:05 AM In reply to

    • vakyin
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    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    The average in a lot of places is now 2 years.

    Refinancing in 30 days is probably unrealistic.  If he is trashing his assets it's probably impossible at all.

  • Tue, Aug 30 2011 10:36 AM In reply to

    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    I am not a lawyer, but I have gone through a divorce.

    I don't know if this is a good deal or otherwise.

    What I can tell you is my divorce took about 5 years.

    It probably would have taken less, but my ex wife fought about 'any' visitation, and when we were almost done, she fired her lawyer and hired a new one.  That alone, I think probably added another year to the process.

    If you soon to be ex, wants to drag this process out, there are all kinds of ways they can do that.  

    Hopefully you can agree on things.  Some people seem to actually want to drag the process out for some reason.  I am not really sure why.  If you are divorcing such a person, it can be quite frsutrating!

    Good luck!

     

  • Wed, Feb 11 2015 11:06 AM In reply to

    • parm
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    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    Thats really frustrating. Why dont the judges understand that its not criminal case and punish for that long. 

    Do you have any suggestion what to do if one spouse wants to drag the case to harass.

    thanks

    parm

  • Wed, Feb 11 2015 11:32 AM In reply to

    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    I am not a divorce lawyer, but I have been through 2 divorces.

    I know one thing is for certain, divorces take time and money.

    You can want it all settled as soon as possible, but that time frame is likely longer than you want.

    I'm not even sure what you think further legal action you think you could do.  

    As far as I know, if he spent marital assets while you were married, there's nothing you are forgiving.  He likely had a legal right to do it.  Morally, I agree with you, but it's part of being married.

    It's very unlikely that he can refinance the house in 30 days.  I refinanced my house and it took several months to complete and I filled out every paper and was available the entire time.  Banks aren't always quick about things.

    I have no clue what felony complaints you have.  Why didn't you already talk to the police about it?  Why are you waiting and using that as leverage?

    I seriously doubt you can "force" this to closure.  My first divorce took me over 6 years to complete.  My ex would not agree to much of anything.

    My 2nd divorce, my now ex wife's lawyer took months to respond to any requests at all.  

    Here is MY advise when it comes to a divorce.  LET YOUR LAWYER HANDLE IT!

    Don't talk to your spouse, and don't get into this so emotionally.  He spent this money and did this that or the other is just how divorces are.  

    I learned and have told my lawyer during my divorce to just handle it, and unless I REALLY need to know about something, don't even tell me.  It only upsets me for no reason.

    That's how I get through a divorce.  You are paying a lawyer to handle it, let him/her do their job.  I wouldn't even be talking to my soon to be ex right now if you are in fact doing that.  And why you are posting all these demands to strangers on the internet, who have no clue if that would be a fair deal or not, I'm not sure?

    Talk to your lawyer about all of this if you have not already.

     

    Good luck!

     

  • Wed, Feb 11 2015 11:34 AM In reply to

    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    my mistake, really old post

    sorry

     

  • Wed, Feb 11 2015 2:22 PM In reply to

    • parm
      Consumer
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    • WI
    • Posts 2

    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    Thanks for your kind advise and I appreciate your kind answer.

    can i get your email address otherwise i have no choice to take advise besides these common websites. Lawyers make money if there are contested issues. They never give right advice on time unless they make lot of money

  • Mon, Oct 31 2016 7:29 AM In reply to

    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    You have a waiting period of 120 days, then the court is required to go to trial in a certain time frame and to find that one out you go to the courts local rules. Always look in the courts local rules as this si where it tells you how to do things. A little secret lawyers(the brotherhood) don't like to tell you.

  • Mon, Oct 31 2016 8:19 AM In reply to

    • Drew
      Consumer
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    • Joined on Thu, Mar 30 2000
    • PA
    • Posts 51,403

    Re: How long can a divorce take?

    Heads up.....Master Blaster ....you are responding to some very old posts...check dates before you post ? 



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