Texas: Grounds for REVERSAL of divorce decree...?

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Latest post 04-08-2009 8:52 AM by SPlum. 8 replies.
  • 04-07-2009 3:23 PM

    • mcgsn32
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    Texas: Grounds for REVERSAL of divorce decree...?

    Hi.  My wife of 25 years and I recently went through a "quickie" no-fault divorce.  She asked for the divorce because she was tired of me struggling professionally and wanted to "have her own life".  This came out of the blue and was a complete shock to me at the time.  There were no signs leading up to this.

    In the very beginning, right after she asked for the divorce, she led me to believe that after the passing of some time and improvement of my work situation we might be able to work it out.  So, in the interest of preventing any kind of scorched-Earth divorce scenario, I agreed to the do-it-yourself no-fault divorce available to us here in Texas.

    This has all taken place within the last 6 months, btw...

    Anyway, as the date for our hearing got closer and closer, her reasons and attitudes changed.  A few weeks after asking for the divorce, she changed her attitude from "we can work on it in the future" to "there's no chance".  That's fine, I thought, these things happen.

    So, we went to court, both answered the judge's questions accordingly, and were granted the divorce.  As we walked out of the court room I told her that I had just lied to the judge.  I didn't want the divorce, and I had no "personality conflict" with her.

    Everything I agreed to relating to our common property and shared assets was based upon the premise that she was simply not happy in the marriage anymore and wanted out.  Again, I was NOT unhappy, but these things do happen.  I asked her on several occasions if there was a third party involved, she assured me there was not every time.

    She was lying.  A month after the divorce was granted my former best friend of 35 years called and told me that he was having a relationship with my (ex) wife.  I subsequently found out that this "relationship" had been going on long before she asked me for the divorce, that they had conspired between themselves to get me to agree to this no-fault divorce so I would just go away without a fight, and I now find myself in the position of having agreed to the divorce under false pretenses engineered by their deception beforehand.

    Needless to say, I am less than happy about all this.  I lost my home, my financial support, and pretty much my entire life.  I have recovered somewhat professionally and am currently in a stable and comfortable  living situation.

    Still, I would like to go back to the judge, request that the original divorce degree be reversed and converted to "contested" or whatever, and force her to revisit a few issues relating to the divorce agreement itself.  After which, I will gladly RE-divorce her.

    People shouldn't lie to judges, and she told a whopper to him and me.

    Any suggestions?

    PS: The divorce was granted in January 2009.  I found out about the cheating and the plot one month later.

     

  • 04-07-2009 3:27 PM In reply to

    • DPH
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    Re: Texas: Grounds for REVERSAL of divorce decree...?

    Consult with a local attorney that specializes in divorce.  You're likely out of luck, but it never hurts to ask. 

    By the way, if you're comfortable and stable, why rock the boat.  Move on with your life and figure that Karma will catch up with both of your ex's.

    "Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience."  -  Mark Twain

     

  • 04-07-2009 3:30 PM In reply to

    • mcgsn32
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    Re: Texas: Grounds for REVERSAL of divorce decree...?

    I would love nothing more than to put this behind me, but I gave her some personal items that I would have kept, and am due about $50K in shared assets that I would rather not leave with the duo of cheaters.

    Maybe I'm a little naive or old fashioned, but I don't think liars should be rewarded and simply walk away scot-free...

  • 04-07-2009 4:52 PM In reply to

    • Drew
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    Re: Texas: Grounds for REVERSAL of divorce decree...?

    One way to get even is to press very hard for money she owes you----



  • 04-07-2009 5:10 PM In reply to

    • mcgsn32
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    Re: Texas: Grounds for REVERSAL of divorce decree...?

    Any amount due me would be difficult to determine.  To her credit (and my embarrassment) we had been living exclusively on her income for quite some time.  However, when I was still doing well, I had convinced her several years back to max out her 401k and I would cover the difference, which has led to a 6-figure 401k for her (it's worth about $160K or so).

    Because I still loved her and wanted her to be OK (assuming she wasn't cheating on me with someone who is relatively well-off!), I left her 401k 100% to her.  I could have taken 50%.

    My main goal in this proposed action is not about money - it's about fact and telling the truth.  She got me to agree to everything through devices of deception (I think that's a legal principle, no - heh heh?), and that's just not right.  I know it sounds corny, but it's really about justice.

    The worst part of it all is that I was baring my soul to the guy she was cheating with during the divorce process, like the big dummy I am.  I told him everything, which naturally he turned around and used against me.  It wasn't that my confidenses were incriminating or derogatory in any way, it's that he knew everything about my desire to revisit the relationship in a few months down the road.

    Looking back on it, that's when things really sped up!

    Thanks for your replies, all.

  • 04-07-2009 6:43 PM In reply to

    • SPlum
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    Re: Texas: Grounds for REVERSAL of divorce decree...?

    You are opposed to lying but you stood in court and lied to a judge. How well do you think that will go over when you try to reverse your divorce  and have to tell the same judge you lied to him. Not so well huh.  Sometimes it's best just to leave well enough alone and move on, no matter how painful it may be.  

  • 04-07-2009 7:58 PM In reply to

    • mcgsn32
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    Re: Texas: Grounds for REVERSAL of divorce decree...?

    I acted based upon the false representations of others - primarily my ex, and as for "moving on", I think I'm doing pretty well given the circumstances.

    This is not about wanting money or my ex back.

    I don't need or want either, quite frankly...

     

  • 04-08-2009 6:47 AM In reply to

    Re: Texas: Grounds for REVERSAL of divorce decree...?

    Generally, you have thirty days to file an appeal.  People can't keep revisiting final orders ( a divorce decree) because they have a change in heart.  That's why the judge bothers to have you in and testify under oath.  In some jurisdictions,  for uncontested divorces, there is no hearing before a judge under oath, it's just paperwork.  Your jurisdiction takes the extra step of questioning parties, under oath. I'm sure you were questioned about any possible marital assets/debts and that none were being claimed.  Move on.

  • 04-08-2009 8:52 AM In reply to

    • SPlum
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    Re: Texas: Grounds for REVERSAL of divorce decree...?

    So what is exactly that you want? You end up being divorced either way.  Does it make that much of a difference to you that it is an uncontested divorce vs contested without any other changes?  She may  not have been honest about why she wanted the divorce, but it doesn't change the fact she wanted the divorce. She did not falsely represent herself in that matter - she wanted the divorce and whether you contested it or not, she still gets the divorce and moves on.

    Anyway, you only have very limited time to appeal and that is only if there has been a procedural error in the trial, or if the ruling of the court was not equitable ...  consult a local attorney if your time has not passed to do so. 

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